What is it about a fried ring of dough that has us so addicted that we drag ourselves out of bed every morning at the crack of dawn to stand in line for half an hour just for a two-minute sugar rush? Is it the smooth, creamy glaze that is so utterly irresistible to our taste buds or is it our culture’s obsession with eating crazy-hybrid cronuts and donut burgers? Whatever the reason, one thing is for sure, the human race is obsessed with donuts.
Here are five things only a donut-obsessed person would understand.
1. It’s a Lifestyle
To be a self-proclaimed donut connoisseur, you need to know where all the pastry hot spots are and whose carrying the high-quality goods. This means stuffing your face..err..sampling donuts in every city you visit and getting on a first name basis with your local baristas and bakers. And, if you’re not first in line when a new donut flavor launches, you might as well not be in line at all.
2. Coffee Addiction: The Struggle is Real
Just when you thought donuts couldn’t get any better, along comes its BFF coffee! Nothing goes better with donuts than a steaming cup of joe. It’s a match made in heaven. Just ask our men and women in blue, they practically sweat caffeine and fried dough; and then there’s the dunk. Rumor has it a famous actress accidentally dropped a donut in her coffee one day, and just like that, the donut dunk was born. One dip of your favorite donut into your morning coffee and you’re hooked!
3. Eating the Last Donut
An unspoken rule exists among coworkers that you shouldn’t eat the last donut. Apparently it’s rude to eat more than everyone else. But donut obsessors live by the first come, first serve rule. And let’s face it, if you had to choose between compromising your integrity and politeness for just one more mouthful of a creamy chocolate glaze, the donut wins every time. Besides, throwing away a perfectly good donut for no reason is practically committing foodie treason.
4. You Spend a Lot of Dough
Once you’ve had a taste of a gourmet donut, no ordinary donut will ever do. These posh pastries are in a league of their own. However, confection concoctions like maple bacon, fried chicken and honey butter, coffee crisp, and margarita, just to name a few, can set you back an upwards of $5.00 a pop! I think I speak for my fellow donut lovers when I say, you had us at maple bacon.
5. Calling Your Child Donut
Naming your child after a favorite food or beverage isn’t as unusual as you might think. Turns out parents have been getting baby name inspiration from their grocery lists for decades. So why not name your kid after a beloved ring-shaped dessert? You wouldn’t be the first to do it; at least 13 people in the U.S. are named Donut.